100 Ways to Annoy a Certain Shorty
by Mei Fire
Summary: JESUS CHRIST, IT'S THE CAPTAIN! GET IN THE CAR!" fic inspired by Valen123456.
1. 30 ways

**MeiFire: **Weeeee...

**Disclaimer: **Back off people, I can believe...

**Note: **Yeah, I'm a fan of Hitsugaya, but when I mean "fan" I mean I like making fun of them for kicks. I'm just psyhcopathic like that. Or something.

This has been enspired by the many funny drabbles on fanfiction.

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1. Call Hitsugaya an Ice Queen 

2. Ask him if he's using black eye-liner. (Doesn't it look like he's using eyeliner?)

3. Ask him if his hair was shot by lightning.

4. Start crunching on ice cubes while he's completing paper work.

5. Tell him that Hinamori stole his hair gel. Or bleach.

6. Walk into his office with a flame thrower.

7. Call him emo.

8. Call him anti-social.

9. Tell him that he needs to quit the loner act.

10. Sing "I pledge allegiance (sp?) to the flag, and that Hitsugaya is a cold fag!" several times.

11. Tell him that Matsumoto stole his hair gel.

12. Run into the room with a pair of haircutting scissors.

13. Dye his hair pink.

14. While he's sleeping, draw the letter "L" on his forehead with a permenant black marker.

15. Put a cherry on top of his head, look at him and frown, saying "Hey, what did you do to my vanilla icecream?"

16. Announce that Hitsugaya attempted to poke Matsumoto's boobs, but he became a wuss and ran away.

17. Ask him where babies come from.

18. Tell him that Ikkaku stole his eyeliner.

19. Call him short. (classic)

20. Tell him you got the supplies he needed for Elementary School.

21. Call him an old geezer.

22. Start crying and say that Hitsugaya stole your makeup kit.

23. Barge into a Captain meeting and ask Hitsugaya if the therapy appointment worked.

24. Wave a match infront of his face, and ask : "Why aren't you scared?!"

25. Ask him if he's a pyromanic.

26. Put a bird ontop of his head, saying that it needed a new nest.

27. Run into his office with toothpaste or glue, saying : "Sorry sir, here's your bleach!"

28. Start rubbing two icecubes together infront of him.

29. Bring in vanilla icecream and yell : "I found your girlfriend!"

30. After doing all of the above, hug him, apologize, and say "Sorry about before. I bought you more hair gel. No hard feelings?"

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**MeiFire: **wtfwtfwtf 

I tried to reach 100, but I got lazy and stopped at 30.

I WISH I CAN DO ALL OF THIS TO THE SHRIMP, RIGHT?


	2. 30 more ways

**MeiFire: **wtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtfwtf

**Disclaimer: **QUIT BUGGING ME, I CAN BELIEVE!

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31. Barge into his office and proudly announce that Hitsugaya needs therapy.

32. Hire "My Chemical Romance" to play as loud as they can in his office.

33. Tell him that Aizen is a pedophile and that he's gonna kidnap Hinamori.

34. Call him an Ice Princess.

35. Call him a bossy prep.

36. Light up a flare in his face.

37. Show a picture of an ice cube melting.

38. Steal his sword and replace it with a spatula.

39. Tell everyone in 10th division that Hitsugaya despises milk.

40. Run up to him with an ice cube and a match and yell "I got your girlfriend, and I'm holding a ransom!"

41. Set his hair on fire.

42. Tell Yachiru that Hitsugaya has a stash of candy and chocolate hidden in the drawer of his desk.

43. Tell Hitsugaya that Gin is right outside of his office and he wants to settle things now.

44. Wake him up in the middle of the night and insist that he should drink milk before going to bed.

45. Tell him being bossy makes you shorter.

46. Give high heel shoes as a present to Hitsugaya.

47. Barge into a Captain meeting and yell "Well, did the therapy appointment work or not?!"

48. Slap him at the back of the head and tell him Hinamori told you to do that.

49. Do the "Electric Slide" in his office.

50. Braid his hair while he's sleeping.

51. Dye his hair orange and call him an Ichigo wannabe.

52. Interrupt another Captain meeting with eyeliner in hand. Shove it in Hitsugaya's hands and say "Sorry, I had to borrow it for a while."

53. Imitate whatever Hitsugaya does.

54. Call him an airhead.

55. Tell him that his fangirls are going out of control and that you gotta sacrifice him so they won't destroy SeiReiTei (I don't know if that's spelled right o.o)

56. Make an accessory out of matches (somehow), walk up to Hitsugaya while wearing it and say "Why aren't you melting?"

57. Slip a teddy bear into his arms while he's sleeping and take a picture of it. Then make flyers out of it and post it all over SeiReiTei. After that, act like you're giving sympathy to Hitsugaya and say "Don't worry, everyone grows out of it."

58. Tell him being angry all the time makes you shorter AND makes your hair white.

59. Put a cup of milk on his desk witha note saying "Don't worry, it won't bite."

60. Tell Hitsugaya that Aizen has the hots for him.

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I'm running out of ideas. If you'd like, PM me your ideas. o.o


	3. 40 more ways

**MeiFire: **LAST 40! ONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO---(gets bricked)

**Disclaimer: **(twitches and gets rabbies)

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61. While he's sleeping, bust into Hitsugaya's room acting like a rabbid animal and attack him. (add whipped cream to your mouth for special effect)

62. Convince Matsumoto to seduce Hitsugaya until he turns purple.

63. Call him a Rukia poser (since they both use ice XP)

64. Tell Zaraki that Hitsugaya has Yachiru captive.

65. Launch fireworks whenever Hitsugaya is present in his office.

66. Bring in a white cat into his office and say "Wha...? I thought this cat was you, Captain! White hair, short, cold..."

67. When Hitsugaya is on a walk, tag along with him pretending to be an FBI agent (sunglasses and a plastic pistol for dramatic effect) and tackle anyone that gets near him, screaming "NO ONE GETS NEAR TOUSHIRO UNLESS YOU'RE AN ALIEN TOO!"

68. Glomp and kiss Toushiro and say it was from the 12th division captain.

69. Throw a rock into his office and scream "FRAG OUT!"

70. Hurdle Ichigo at Hitsugaya. When asked why you did that, shrug and say "I thought there would be an explosion."

71. Throw a bunny plushie at him whenever Rukia is present.

72. Barge into a Captain's office and nail a whole pie right smack in Hitsugaya's face and say "That was from my mom. She said she wants her make up kit back now."

73. Imitate whatever he does again, only exaggerate it and act like an idiot.

74. Make fart noises with your armpit or your mouth in between sentences while talking to Hitsugaya or when he's talking.

75. Tell him that Hinamori is dating Aizen.

76. Hurdle Edward Elric at Hitsugaya and say that Ed claims he's taller than you.

77. Record them fighting and save the video for future generations.

78. While Hitsugaya is giving orders, cover your ears and scream "BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, I CAN'T HEAR YOOOOOOU!"

79. Bring in a bowl of fried shrimp and say "Sorry, I cooked your relatives."

80. Rant about how everyone's hair is stupid and such, and say that it came from Hitsugaya.

81. Hire "System of the Down" to play "Pizza Pie" or whatever in his office as loud as they can while Hitsugaya is finishing paper work.

82. Spray whipped cream everywhere in his office and say that he won't be alone now.

83. When he asks you if you have any sanity, go "Sanity? AHAHAHAHAHA, WHAT SANITY?!" Start shaking him like mad.

84. Tell Kyouraku that Hitsugaya called him gay.

85. Poor soda onto his hair.

86. Toss Yoruichi at Hitsugaya's hair while she's in cat form.

87. Toss a wild street cat at Hitsugaya's hair.

88. Record it and save it as blackmail.

89. Back sass Hitsugaya. (running out of creative ideas XD)

90. Politely ask him "How's the weather down there?"

91. Toss Cloud (while he's in his doll) at Hitsugaya whenever Rukia is present.

92. Put his robe on fire.

93. Throw confetti when Hitsugaya comes in his office and say "CONGRAGULATIONS! You're in your office! You win...MORE PAPER WORK! GOOD FOR YOU!" Then toss the massive piles of papers at him.

94. Bring in a bunch of Elementary School supplies, dump it right in front of his face and say "Well, are you gonna use these or not?!"

95. Give Yachiru loads of candy and say that it was from Hitsugaya.

96. Place a limbo stick near his door, make sure it's high so it reaches his forehead. When he bangs his head onto the stick, shake your head sympathetically and say "Do I HAVE to lower the Limbo stick even LOWER?"

97. Put a frozen icecube in your mouth and spit it at him.

98. Tell everyone on how Hitsugaya's hair was shot by lightning when he was a child.

99. Dye his hair red and call him a Nova wannabe.

100. Knock him unconsious and tell him how hard it was to make a list of 100 ways to annoy him. Repeat everything on a daily bases.

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LASKJCDLKASJBORH I'M DONE! (faints)

My brain hurts from trying to think some ideas.


End file.
